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About Angels
I love to encourage people to believe in their own intuition, visions, dreams and sense about a person or situation in general! There are so many examples I could give where people did not listen to what others told them and followed their gut instinct and were blessed for it. Never question it for once you own your intuition, begin really listening, a kind of magic unfolds and your intuition will become clearer and clearer with time because you experience little miracles regarding how it made a world of difference to listen! 
I love telling stories so I will share one with you in hopes of inspiring you to listen to your own truth!
Once upon a time there was a lady who grew up very intuitive. She many times was teased, labeled, called names because her heart was so open she thought it was natural to share what she saw sensed and felt. After about 10 years of hiding this part of herself, because she wanted to feel she belonged, her life began what some may call “falling apart”. Taking care of her elder in laws, her and her husband both losing their jobs she contracted an illness from a hospital and was sick for a year. Soon after she lost a baby and her father passed away. They lost their house and everything their owned. Well enough to travel she packed up and followed spirits voice, or her intuition..a vision she had of moving to California to start over. Her husband stayed behind to wrap up business. After living in a van for a while her husband came out and they together began rebuilding their lives. She decided to look at all of the losses as new beginnings and thanked the angel she saw, before she moved, that encouraged her to go back to trusting her inner voice and move to CA to start anew and her family would heal, her son would come out, and the family would come together again. She really had no choice. No family could take her in except her sister in California who had a van she could hang out in and a back porch she made a tent on and a job waiting. Her husband had been put in jail for something he did not do and although he was found innocent it was the one last things spirit made happen to relieve all doubt..she had to go..no house..no man..no money! She even visited the dangerous man who really did do the crime to tell him she only had a 1.17 cash and was scared and to please tell the truth about what happened so she could stay in her home and keep her family together. He laughed at her and pushed her out the door. Skipping a couple of years she was now in a rental her husband was there and was hired doing something she really loved and could work from home. Her son whom with a broken heart she left in Michigan with his father from her first marriage came out and her family was together again. He was safe there until she had a home. Her four year old started kindergarten while they lived out of a van. No need to put him through that also.
At 40 years old she became pregnant. It was a beautiful surprise and finally it just felt as if life was sweeter than it had been in a long time. Into her third month the doctor told her her baby would be born with a rare illness, would only live 2 months and to prepare her family and abort the baby immediately. She went home in shock. Another kick in the gut and other loss. She remembered the angel that had come to her and encouraged her to move to California and showed her that her family would heal and come together again. She also showed this mom to be that her baby WOULD live. She asked to name the child after her and believe the pregnancy would be blessed. The mom to be, decided to keep the baby. She spent the next 4-5 mos in bed praying every waking moment. Asking the baby’s illness would be filtered into her own body. She ended up with big black welts and raised bumps all over her legs. She gained 125 pounds was in pain and constant sensation her legs were on fire. The last month she did not even lift her head to greet visitors. What kept her going was her belief that what she heard, saw, sensed and envisioned was HER truth and she NEVER stopped believing that!
One day the baby was born and the baby was not breathing. She remembers the same doctor that told her to abort looked at the baby and gave her a look like “ I told you so now look”. As they revived the baby girl the mom said out loud to her husband “ I am naming the baby after my angel: “Ania” is her name”. If she only got to hold her precious bundle for a few weeks then so be it! She will meet her family and they would all love her as much as they could while she was there! 
So 12 years later “Ania” is a beautiful sweet kind creative funny little animal whisperer, actress, computer geek, sister, daughter, cousin, the youngest tribal leader at her school and so much more! 
She is here because I listened. I spent 10 years not listening and lost everything I had built on what others thought for me! Never again! I always encouraged my children to trust their own truths, when they would listen My Ania is a miracle and living proof that YOU MUST LISTEN and teach your children to trust themselves also! Look what I have been blessed with now, because I always do! Join me and listen to your own beautiful inner voice!
 
Photo: Angel AniaPhoto: Angel AniaPhoto: Ania Playing TatAnia in Shakespeares 'The Midsummer Night's Dream'

 

7-10-08 Moms journey home

Well, this is not, really, one of those paticular experiences about following spirits direction, yet, I wanted to share one of the most challenging and emotional experiences in my life. Sometimes, sharing these life altering experinces can offer comfort and inspiration to other moving through a similar experince.

Shirleys journey home
The passing of my mama


How thankful I feel that I was able to be with my mom when she left her body and began her sacred journey home!

All of my siblings made the trip possible in one way or another and I will be eternally grateful!

My daughter Nicole and I were able to travel, almost, 3000 miles to be with Mom a few weeks back.

The night before she crossed over I had some time alone with her , in her hospital room. This was precious time I feel so blessed to have. I was able to do and say things to her and somehow..I knew she was aware, even though the doctors stated she was brain dead and was not aware. I felt my father in the room and let her know I did...I rubbed her shoulders and said to her " I know how much you miss dads backrubs so I am going to rub your shoulders...how does that feel mom?" Even though her mouth hung open and her eyes remained shut..she took 2 big deep sighs (twice)and i felt her body relax even more. I did a couple of silly things that I knew would make her laugh..if she could laugh! I had some warm comfort tea which I like to use in a hot tub. it is very soothing to my skin. I gently rubbed a little on her head and arms and told her this special tea had been blessed by the flower fairies..I know she would have loved me saying that because of her love for flower fairies. I gave her a little mowhawk and said : "haha you have a mohawk" ...lol..then i fixed it back..but I know she loved to laugh and just had to do something silly. We enjoyed the silly times we had together.Then I went through times of my life i remember that she had great impacts on me...she taught me how to love and forgive other children that were being mean..I will always remember that. I thanked her for many things. I held her hands and kissed her face and hands all over..I let her know that if any of us could do anything we would..and I was sorry..and we all were..if she was uncomfortable at all..Ann, my neice, showed me, the day before, how to moisten her mouth without making her choke..so i did that., I also cleaned all of the crusties out of her eyes the way she did for me when i was little. I was glad I did that because she opened her eyes and one point and moved them to focus on me! After laughing and crying and talking with her (or near her) I finially said..dad is here mom..he misses you..he wants to sit in my chair so i will leave you two alone for now and see you soon! I put a blanket over her feet because they felt cold..I left but ended up coming back for a minute to say bye one more time..i laid my head on her lap like i used to when I was little and held her hand and just stayed there for awhile.

 

The next day I arrived at the hospital around noon.. my sister kristina , brother terry and neice,faith, were there. I rememebr faith touching and rubbing grammas legs softly and faiths presence was so grounded and strong..I just love her spirit and am thankful I am in the same family as her!Thank god for terry, my brother. he is a beautiful man, my brother..he took care of and im sure is still taking care of mom and dads business affairs..alot of work. thank god for kristina who let gramma live with her..kristina and keith went above and beyond the call of duty helping mom..I will always be thankful for them!

I really felt grampa in the room that morning. I went near gramma and held her hand and kris and i and terry all rubbed her head and said nice things to her..we told her "all of the kids were here" and "everyone is here, mom" because we were if not physically..in spirit..and we all let her know..its ok to go mom..go have another honeymoon!

Ken and Barb spent soo much time there(my brother and sister in law)..I feel so thankful to be in the same family as ken and barb also..Barb has been like..the strength of the family in soo many ways..we are so blessed to know her and love her. we told mom its ok to go laugh and play and be free! soon enough..your children will be following you one day..so do it now while you can hehe.

I think the turning point and a relaxing time for her..because her bodys energy seemed to change from static to calm in a sense.was when kristina..the baby of the family, touched moms head and said..its ok to go mom..were grown up now..we will be ok here..im sorry it took so long mom...

I feel mom needed to hear her baby say those things and I thought it was so wonderful of kristina to say those unselfish things to mama!

of course, Im betting we would all rather her not go, if she had a chance of being healthy and strong, yet, her brain functions were gone..and she was unable , so it seemed, to open her eyes or close her mouth at all..I felt sorry for her because her mouth was bone dry from being open the way it was..we took turns sponging her mouth and trying to keep it moist..she hated beign thirsty..but the docs said she had no sensation like hunger or thirst. The water IV and food were just bloating her up..like her body was rejecting those things. So it seems..her body was done..it was tired..it had fought the great fight and it was ready to set her free once again to return home to the father!

before we all sat down i put my face right up to her and said we love you mom..do you know we are here? can you let me know..and she opned her eyes! she actually tried to move her mouth up and down to say words and even tho they didnt come out..I know she said "i love you" to all of us..i heard it in my head..somehow she communicated that. then she swallowed! i said wow! good job mom wow..you swallowed! then she swallowed again! Now I know she knew we were there!

After we all said things to her we just sat down and I think i said outloud: wow grampa is here..i can feel it..i see that yellow sparkely light i saw when he crossed over. I also saw a vertical band of light and a rainbow type shape clear whitish light hovering above mom..and i sensed it was her spirit..and sure enough..a few secs later she took her last breath..i felt she was happy and joyful and releived.

I still miss having a mommy to hug :) I felt how much she missed my dad..and i felt the joy when she saw him again..it was and still is very comforting. I am thankful for being able to sense these things.

I stayed a little while longer just to look at her and kiss her because I knew this was the last time I would be able to in the physical sense.

At the ceremony/gathering for her..there was a mixture of peace..releif she was no longer in pain and intense emotions...sadness too..but anytime I felt the urge to cry..I heard my mom say "dont cry nancy! look! were dancing!"

I heard this about 4-5 times during the ceremony and one time it made me chuckle outloud. :)

Thanks mama for teaching me how to love. Thanks for letting me know you and dad are dancing..thank you for the dream i had last night where you came and kissed me all over my face..like i had done for you when you laid in bed.I am so happy ann and charles sensed to get married early so gramma could be there! what a gift for everyone!

I love my life here and still have lots of reasons to be here! Also...I still look forward to the day when I see you and dad again, love always, nancy

Watch a movie I made about my mom as I was with her when she crossed over

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